family gatherings

I love Christmas. I love family gatherings and traditions and the opportunity to spread a little cheer. I’m not so much a fan of organising such events though.

My maternal family is somewhat dysfunctional at times. Organising anything is akin to embarking on a journey of impossible obstacles and challenges in order to reach a semi amicable result. The biggest disagreements come about organising gatherings, but once we’re all together things are often quite lovely, fun and memorable.

However, dysfunction isn't necessarily a bad word. This isn’t a public rant about family, but an observation of how we are educated.

 In life we’re often faced with groups of people we’d rather feed to the lions than reach agreeable terms with, so it might seem that family negotiations are fantastic practice for life. Not that I’d like to feed my family to the lions, well not normally, but sometimes the fusion of diverse personalities does provide an opportunity to learn.

Holding your tongue when Aunty Betty moans and gripes about things from six years ago, or artfully guiding the conversation back to point when Uncle Bert starts pointing out that Betty could do with a shave and a good root is all didactic really. It’s not just table manners and morals that family impart upon us, but the abilities we need to interact within society.

 At this rate, I should be a shoe-in for the role of human resources manager at the United Nations!

Alas, I’m not known for having a lot of tact (or keeping my mouth shut to start with). It’s something that I’ve had to learn and I’m continuing to learn. I mean really, sometimes it’s all too hard to keep it shut for the sake of honesty, but on the whole it’s hardly helpful.

While a few witty remarks can make heated exchanges more interesting, I’ve finally realised it doesn’t always bring tempers down to a simmer. Which is a pity really. I’ve amassed a few good retorts in my arsenal of late.

This year I’m asking Father Christmas for more tact, more patience, and the ability to see things from another person’s point of view. I’m asking that family just gets on with being just that, family, and I wish you all happy gatherings!